Day 23: The Good

First of all, this title made me think of the Wicked song, “For Good” which then brought a whole new onslaught of tears. It’s the one where Elphaba and Galinda are parting ways and understanding just how impactful the other had been. On a day that felt like a giant missed goodbye, the tears started all over with the memory of that song.  Although, to be fair, I think that song always makes me cry.

I have been a near basket case for weeks. I always have big emotions, as we would say at school, but I’m usually able to keep them just tamped down enough to be functional. ;) Most of you don’t know the I cry on the turn of a dime. Folgers commercials at Christmas, pulling over for an ambulance, the ending to an 80s movie, the retelling of almost any book…tears. The school closure is definitely hard to take, but it also sits on week 12 of my remodel, and crashing with my parents.   For this fiercely independent girl, it has taken a toll. So, at the end up my rope already, this week has been impossible. The closure of Washington schools sent me right over the edge, and I had barely come back before  our Oregon announcement.  There’s so much grief for what is being missed.  My class, for sure, but also the series of “lasts” for our sweet Gearhart School. And so, I search for a legit silver lining, the one that will keep my head above the flood-line. 

The Good:

• I’m safe
• I’m healthy
• I have nearly scientific evidence, after all this, that my migraine injection is working
• I have a big beautiful beach in my backyard
• My dad laid in snacks from Costco like it’s Y2K
• So far, my pants still fit
• I’m tech savvy enough for this online school adventure
• I work in an incredibly supportive community
• So far, construction is moving forward
• That checkerboard floor is just like Westminster (if Westminster were done in lino)
• I have good friends that I can laugh and cry with
• I have sand in my shoes
• The tide comes in, and goes back out, no matter what. No matter what.

And perhaps the most good that I found today was the arms of my mom. I know that I am blessed to have this. I know that not everyone can see and hold their people right now.  After the news broke, I hopped in my car, drove to 7Dees, walked right to the front of the “here to pick up soil” line, and sobbed.  And I could do that.  💜